Lately, I've been a bit unsure...of where God has me. I haven't felt this unsure in such a long time, its quite uncomfortable. So, I'm asking God why? Why the uncertainty? Why do I feel like all of a sudden I don't know which way to go...am I in the right place or is there another road I must follow?
Then it came to me as I was asking God...I answered my own question...You've never let me down! Anytime I've felt unsure, confused, not knowing which way to go...You've never let down! I don't always know what's around the corner or down the road but as I step a little closer to You...You never let me down! You said "if I draw near to You, You would draw near to me". Now, I may not be sure of where I'm going at this point but I'm sure of the fact that You're right beside me guiding me all the way. I know if I just trust in you Lord and not try to figure things out according to my own way of thinking...I know without a shadow of a doubt that you will direct my paths.
I just keep reminding myself...You've never let me down, You've never let me down! Its such a relief that I don't have to figure it out all by myself. This one thing I know (and am sure of)..."that He who hath begun a good work in me will perform it...! Aaaahhh...what a great feeling!! Thank You Father for never letting me down!
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Reminding Me...
Well, today was a day of reflection as I laid in my bed near tears...thinking about how far God has brought me yet feeling like I was regressing(is that a word?lol) back into my previous state...a state of uncertainty and insecurity. Well, as I continued to lay there, God started reminding me...
Reminding me of the time He saved me from myself. Reminding me of how He healed me from the inside out...healing me of that uncertainty and insecurity...that I felt about myself, not knowing how much He loved me and how much I should love myself, not realizing that I was made after His image. Reminding me of the time that I wanted to take my own life, not feeling like I measured up...as a wife, as a mother, as a woman, but then He swooped in and saved me. Reminding me of who I am...a virtuous woman, a giver, a lover of people, an encourager, an exhorter.
God spent the day reminding me...of all that He's done...in my life, in my marriage, my family and my home. He reminded me that I have so much to be grateful for..."so, why sit there and die!"
He reminded me that I shall not die but live and declare the works of the Lord. He reminded me how to speak life...in my marriage, in my home, in my finances!
I thank God for a day of remembrance...do you remember?!
Reminding me of the time He saved me from myself. Reminding me of how He healed me from the inside out...healing me of that uncertainty and insecurity...that I felt about myself, not knowing how much He loved me and how much I should love myself, not realizing that I was made after His image. Reminding me of the time that I wanted to take my own life, not feeling like I measured up...as a wife, as a mother, as a woman, but then He swooped in and saved me. Reminding me of who I am...a virtuous woman, a giver, a lover of people, an encourager, an exhorter.
God spent the day reminding me...of all that He's done...in my life, in my marriage, my family and my home. He reminded me that I have so much to be grateful for..."so, why sit there and die!"
He reminded me that I shall not die but live and declare the works of the Lord. He reminded me how to speak life...in my marriage, in my home, in my finances!
I thank God for a day of remembrance...do you remember?!
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Economic Status
I know...it's been a while...but here I am!
Well, I've been thinking about the "economy"...I haven't heard anyone use that word so much in my life as I have over the past year. I am so glad that the "economy" doesn't determine my economic status. I have to say that I am just really figuring that out.
I have been a full-time nail tech for 6 yrs. now and I have not seen the beauty industry in such a down-slide as it is today. Due to the "economy", they say, people are not getting those little extras done like they used to...so my paychecks have been suffering suffice it to say. At first...I ain't gon lie...I was freakin out! I'm like okay...we don' moved out here to Texas and I thought I was gon' be ballin' shot callin'. Yeah right! I was ballin' tears and callin' on Jesus! So, when I got through all that, I figured it out (light bulb!)!
God told me "I didn't bring you all the way out here to leave you high and dry. The "economy" doesn't determine your economic status, I do!" After that, I was done cryin', worryin' and stressin'. I mean it, I refuse to worry about something I don't have the power to change, so I gave that thing to God, the only one who does have the power to bring change. I am doing the one thing I can do...pray & trust God.
God is making provisions for us like never before! Am I clothes shopping? Nope. Am I eating out every night? Nope. Am I shoppin' for new furniture and decorating my house? Nope. But...do I have a roof over my head? Yep. Do my kids have clothes on their back? Yep. Are we eatin'? Yep. God is takin' care of us and teaching us how to trust Him and Him only.
Don't let this "economy" get you all bent out of shape and don't let it determine your economic status. I don't care what you are goin' through, if you just give it to God, He will take care of you. You ain't gon' come out over night but joy can come in the mornin'...if you give it to God...you'll wake up with a new attitude...and a new status. Praise God!
Well, I've been thinking about the "economy"...I haven't heard anyone use that word so much in my life as I have over the past year. I am so glad that the "economy" doesn't determine my economic status. I have to say that I am just really figuring that out.
I have been a full-time nail tech for 6 yrs. now and I have not seen the beauty industry in such a down-slide as it is today. Due to the "economy", they say, people are not getting those little extras done like they used to...so my paychecks have been suffering suffice it to say. At first...I ain't gon lie...I was freakin out! I'm like okay...we don' moved out here to Texas and I thought I was gon' be ballin' shot callin'. Yeah right! I was ballin' tears and callin' on Jesus! So, when I got through all that, I figured it out (light bulb!)!
God told me "I didn't bring you all the way out here to leave you high and dry. The "economy" doesn't determine your economic status, I do!" After that, I was done cryin', worryin' and stressin'. I mean it, I refuse to worry about something I don't have the power to change, so I gave that thing to God, the only one who does have the power to bring change. I am doing the one thing I can do...pray & trust God.
God is making provisions for us like never before! Am I clothes shopping? Nope. Am I eating out every night? Nope. Am I shoppin' for new furniture and decorating my house? Nope. But...do I have a roof over my head? Yep. Do my kids have clothes on their back? Yep. Are we eatin'? Yep. God is takin' care of us and teaching us how to trust Him and Him only.
Don't let this "economy" get you all bent out of shape and don't let it determine your economic status. I don't care what you are goin' through, if you just give it to God, He will take care of you. You ain't gon' come out over night but joy can come in the mornin'...if you give it to God...you'll wake up with a new attitude...and a new status. Praise God!
Friday, February 20, 2009
Use Your Marriage as a Weapon
I was talking with one of my co-workers yesterday, she and her husband are leaders in the "Reconciliation Ministry" at her church. I didn't know what it was at first, never heard of that. So, apparently, its a ministry where married couples considering divorce come so that they (the ministry) can help reconcile the marriage or determmine whether or not they have irreconcilable differences according to the Word and grounds for divorce.
I found this to be very interesting and very disturbing at the same time! It brought me back to the time my husband and I felt like we had irreconcilable differences in our marriage...and at some point thought about divorce. I began to share my testimony with her. Just over a year ago, Who would've thought that Diondrea and I were thinking about divorce... never at the same time though. He wanted to divorce me...then I wanted to divorce him. We were both just angry about reasons we can't even really explain. It wasn't until we stopped looking at each other's faults and looked at ourselves that God was able to begin to heal our marriage.
I realized that the devil was trying to use our marriage as a weapon AGAINST us...and we allowed him to do it. Well, when I realized that, I began to use my marriage as a weapon AGAINST the devil. I really started reading and heeding to the book "Power of a Praying Wife". The very first chapter is about the wife and praying for herself to confess and get healed from all the hurt and anger she felt towards her husband. I started warfare-ing for myself, my husband and marriage like never before (after a few sessions with Pastor Lathon, nonetheless). But I refused to accept what the devil was attempting to do in my marriage.
Well, all I can say now is...praise God!! God has not only miraculously healed my marriage but He has truy transformed my marriage. Diondrea and I will be celebrating 12 years of marriage this May! Only God could have done this!!
I heard Apostle Turner say years ago, "It takes two people to get married but only one person to destroy the marriage." I didn't understand that statement back then, young and in love, but I definitely understand it now. If just one of us had decided that we just wasn't gon' try to work it out and one of us filed for divorce, that would've been it.
It was hard and it was a process but we worked it out TOGETHER through much prayer and much warfare.
Don't let the enemy use your marriage against you, use your marriageas a weapon against the enemy. If you stand strong, there is no way he can win. FIGHT BACK!!
I found this to be very interesting and very disturbing at the same time! It brought me back to the time my husband and I felt like we had irreconcilable differences in our marriage...and at some point thought about divorce. I began to share my testimony with her. Just over a year ago, Who would've thought that Diondrea and I were thinking about divorce... never at the same time though. He wanted to divorce me...then I wanted to divorce him. We were both just angry about reasons we can't even really explain. It wasn't until we stopped looking at each other's faults and looked at ourselves that God was able to begin to heal our marriage.
I realized that the devil was trying to use our marriage as a weapon AGAINST us...and we allowed him to do it. Well, when I realized that, I began to use my marriage as a weapon AGAINST the devil. I really started reading and heeding to the book "Power of a Praying Wife". The very first chapter is about the wife and praying for herself to confess and get healed from all the hurt and anger she felt towards her husband. I started warfare-ing for myself, my husband and marriage like never before (after a few sessions with Pastor Lathon, nonetheless). But I refused to accept what the devil was attempting to do in my marriage.
Well, all I can say now is...praise God!! God has not only miraculously healed my marriage but He has truy transformed my marriage. Diondrea and I will be celebrating 12 years of marriage this May! Only God could have done this!!
I heard Apostle Turner say years ago, "It takes two people to get married but only one person to destroy the marriage." I didn't understand that statement back then, young and in love, but I definitely understand it now. If just one of us had decided that we just wasn't gon' try to work it out and one of us filed for divorce, that would've been it.
It was hard and it was a process but we worked it out TOGETHER through much prayer and much warfare.
Don't let the enemy use your marriage against you, use your marriageas a weapon against the enemy. If you stand strong, there is no way he can win. FIGHT BACK!!
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
An Uncomfortable Place
I woke up in an uncomfortable place today! It's a place where God put me, it's unfamiliar territory...to me...but not to God. It's more of that repositioning taking place! I didn't sleep good last night because of all the discomfort I felt....in my mind...in my heart...in my spirit. What is this God...why am I feelng this way? You're taking me from a place I've known for years, a place I've made my home, all my family and friends are here, we all speak the same language. What's this, God? I don't understand...I thought I would be here forever...LOOK! This is my spot....finders-keepers, losers-weepers. This is the most comfortable place in the world, it's so soft & cuddly, keeping me warm in a cold world.....it's a cold world out there, Lord, did you know that?!
Now, you've taken me from that place of comfort and put into this uncomfortable place. My seat is cold...I don't know these people...and they don't know me. Why God...what is this all about? I have to find my way around here and you didn't even leave me a road map. I have to learn a new language and I didn't even have a chance to study.
But wait...ok, here we go! You left me a manual, it's pretty thick but I think I can handle it. It has all the instructions I think I need in this new place...it's still a little uncomfortable but now I don't feel so alone.
In this manual, God tells me "...I know the thoughts that I think toward you...thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you an expected end." Jere. 29:11
So, I guess wherever God takes me, He'll provide, He has a plan for me, there's hope for my future. So, I guess I don't have to worry about where He's taken me from but where He's taking me to. And that doesn't mean that where I came from was insignificant, it was just used as a slingshot to get me to my next destination.
That was once me, not understanding why I had to switch careers, make new friends, move to a different city, join a new church family! But now I get it!
When we go through different things in our lives and God starts moving things around like a jigsaw puzzle, it's hard to understand at first. It's hard to understand losing a job, losing a house or car, losing a loved one or losing friends. But we have to know that in God we are going to suffer some discomfort "knowing that the trying of our faith worketh patience". Like a wonderful Apostle I know always says "God wants you comforted but He doesn't want you comfortable!". And I learned that to be true the hard way...but it's all good!
Be open to what God wants to do in your life...don't stay stuck...let Him take you to an uncomfortable place, it's all for your good!!
Now, you've taken me from that place of comfort and put into this uncomfortable place. My seat is cold...I don't know these people...and they don't know me. Why God...what is this all about? I have to find my way around here and you didn't even leave me a road map. I have to learn a new language and I didn't even have a chance to study.
But wait...ok, here we go! You left me a manual, it's pretty thick but I think I can handle it. It has all the instructions I think I need in this new place...it's still a little uncomfortable but now I don't feel so alone.
In this manual, God tells me "...I know the thoughts that I think toward you...thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you an expected end." Jere. 29:11
So, I guess wherever God takes me, He'll provide, He has a plan for me, there's hope for my future. So, I guess I don't have to worry about where He's taken me from but where He's taking me to. And that doesn't mean that where I came from was insignificant, it was just used as a slingshot to get me to my next destination.
That was once me, not understanding why I had to switch careers, make new friends, move to a different city, join a new church family! But now I get it!
When we go through different things in our lives and God starts moving things around like a jigsaw puzzle, it's hard to understand at first. It's hard to understand losing a job, losing a house or car, losing a loved one or losing friends. But we have to know that in God we are going to suffer some discomfort "knowing that the trying of our faith worketh patience". Like a wonderful Apostle I know always says "God wants you comforted but He doesn't want you comfortable!". And I learned that to be true the hard way...but it's all good!
Be open to what God wants to do in your life...don't stay stuck...let Him take you to an uncomfortable place, it's all for your good!!
Sunday, February 15, 2009
Repositioning Yourself
I've been re-reading the book "Reposition Yourself" by Bishop T.D. Jakes and it has reminded me why God has set me in certain places. God is always causing me to come out of my comfort zone and I always wonder...Why?! Why does God take us from one place to another...repositioning us? I believe God repositions us to take us to the next level in Him...in business...in life.
When God first spoke to me about moving to Dallas, I thought I was trippin. I was like...what we gon do in Dallas? Well, I told my husband Diondrea and he was like...Yeah, ok. He just kind of entertained me by taking a trip with me to Dallas and we checked it out and everything but he seriously wasn't ready to move. I already knew in my spirit that God was "repositioning us". I didn't know why but all I knew is God has something for us in Dallas. Now, we had lived in Chicago our whole lives and been in the same ministry for 20 yrs and never really positioned ourselves in a place where we could be used by God...we just kind of sat back in the cut.
Well, let me tell you something...when God repositions you, He does not take NO for an answer! Long story short...we now live in McKinney, TX about 30 min. outside of Dallas. God has put us in a place where there had to be a YES in our mouth. It seems like a dream because it happened so fast!
When God repositions you, it is so He can either bless you, use you to bless others or both. You have to be open for repositioning, sometimes it doesn't make sense...you don't know what the outcome will be. But let me tell you...God knows what He is doing...just open your heart and mind...don't limit God and don't limit yourself.
When God first spoke to me about moving to Dallas, I thought I was trippin. I was like...what we gon do in Dallas? Well, I told my husband Diondrea and he was like...Yeah, ok. He just kind of entertained me by taking a trip with me to Dallas and we checked it out and everything but he seriously wasn't ready to move. I already knew in my spirit that God was "repositioning us". I didn't know why but all I knew is God has something for us in Dallas. Now, we had lived in Chicago our whole lives and been in the same ministry for 20 yrs and never really positioned ourselves in a place where we could be used by God...we just kind of sat back in the cut.
Well, let me tell you something...when God repositions you, He does not take NO for an answer! Long story short...we now live in McKinney, TX about 30 min. outside of Dallas. God has put us in a place where there had to be a YES in our mouth. It seems like a dream because it happened so fast!
When God repositions you, it is so He can either bless you, use you to bless others or both. You have to be open for repositioning, sometimes it doesn't make sense...you don't know what the outcome will be. But let me tell you...God knows what He is doing...just open your heart and mind...don't limit God and don't limit yourself.
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